Well, it has taken me 6 days to "get it together" enough to write about this. I had a dose of harsh reality Wednesday of last week when I tried to exercise my "duty" to give blood. I have always felt strongly about blood donation, and since there are so few who can and will, I try to do it when the blood mobile comes by our office. This time was really important, because of all the suffering people in Haiti! I used to give every 2 months, until I pushed myself when I was borderline anemic and went ahead and donated, and ended up barfing up oreo cookies on a patient and passing out in his house. All I could say was "I ate oreos. It's not coffee grounds" (meaning, "I don't have a GI bleed, I just ate oreos, which can look a heck of a lot like the crap you barf up if you do have a GI bleed.") Anyway, I went in the bus, and did all pre-donation stuff, then she took my blood pressure. 176/110!!! Yep, that's where you are when you can have a stroke, and end up REALLY messed up!! They made me wait and took it again: 150/108! Bingo! Still too bad to donate, still REALLY bad. Well, as a nurse and a perfe
ctly manipulative and in denial one at that, I figured that my BP would be up when I went to my yearly Dr appointment later that afternoon, so having a pint of blood drawn off that day would drop my blood pressure for that visit, but they wouldn't take it. Long story short, I'm now on a strict diet of low salt, low cholesterol (no fried food), and low calorie. I'm also on BP pills twice a day. My thyroid was worse, my BP was bad, my cholesterol sux, I'm having sleep apnea (I'll talk about that in a minute), and my weight has gone up ridiculously since I was there Oct. 2008. Yes, I got married AND became the supervisor all at one time, but I am so irritated with myself!! Yes, I have a very stressful job, but I should have more control than this!! She also broke it to me that I will be "high risk" if I get pregnant. Not what I wanted to hear. I want to be "low risk" and use a midwife in a birthing center in a tub! I'm not a hospital person. They give me the shakes!!(Back to Sleep apnea) I have always been a sleep talker/walker, no biggie, as a matter of fact, Robert has really funny stories about some of my shenanigans. He even finds it funny depending on the amount of sleep he has had. Well, the last few months, Robert has noticed that I quit breathing. He used to wake me up saying "Are you ok? You aren't breathing. That freaks me out!!!" Well, he knows I will start back breathing, so he doesn't wake me as much. He said I go 15-20 seconds without breathing (apnea.) This can increase blood pressure and cause weakness, irritability, weight gain, feeling of fatigue all the time, swelling of the ankle, etc. All of these are me. I went for a sleep study Friday night and I'm waiting for the results. I didn't sleep well, so I'm not sure if they will find anything.
I have been eating sensibly for a week now, and I'm doing really well with it. I thought going without fried food would completely go against my Southern system, and in some ways it has, but I'm dealing with the emotional part of dieting really well this time. I think the whole idea that "it's do or die" helps. Also the "over achiever"/OCD part of my personality kicked in because I WILL be "low risk" if I get pregnant.
Anyway, our house is on a diet! I'll keep y'all update on it! So far, I don't feel homicidal, or even depressed. I actually feel better. I cried all the way home from the Dr Wednesday night, but I'm great now. It's amazing how much better I feel since I had my head pulled out of my ass with my well-timed dose of reality. Thanks for all of your support!!! Love, Shannon
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